Having High Standards and Low Expectations
Let’s talk about a mindset shift that’s quietly powerful and surprisingly liberating—holding yourself to high standards while expecting very little from the world around you.
Most people reverse the formula. They expect the world to be generous, people to be kind, and success to be linear—and when those expectations aren’t met, they stall, they wait, and they spiral. But when you flip it—when you demand more from yourself and less from everything else—you start to move forward. You stop waiting for ideal conditions and start creating momentum.
This is what we call aiming up, and it starts with two simple principles.
1) Use High Standards as Your Inner Compass
High standards aren’t about perfection. They’re about intention. They’re the quiet voice that nudges you forward. Holding yourself to high standards means showing up like it matters—even when no one’s watching. It means training when it’s inconvenient, speaking the truth even when it costs you, and building a life that feels earned.
High standards are the compass that keeps you aligned with who you want to be—not just what you want to achieve.
2) User Low Expectations as Emotional Armor
Low expectations aren’t about giving up—they’re about letting go. Letting go of the fantasy that people will always understand you, that effort guarantees applause, or that validation must arrive when you act. When you expect less from the world, you open yourself up to more surprise, more gratitude, and more resilience. You stop tying your self-worth to outcomes, and you stop waiting for the world to cooperate before you begin.
This kind of detachment isn’t apathy. It’s the ability to care deeply about your work, your growth, and your values without needing the world to clap for you. It’s the quiet freedom to act without reward, to give without a thank-you,
The Coffee Talker’s Challenge
Here’s a simple challenge to put this mindset into practice:
Choose one area of your life—this can e.g., be work, fitness, relationships, finance, or creativity.
Set a personal standard for how you’ll show up this week. Not a goal. A standard. This can be: “I will write for 30 minutes every morning.” “I will respond to emails within 24 hours.” “I will speak kindly, even when I’m frustrated.”
Expect nothing in return. No praise, no results, no recognition, don’t check for likes, and don’t wait for feedback.
Do it anyway. Follow through, stay consistent, and keep your word to yourself.
Reflect at the end of the week. Did it make a difference? We bet it did! Freeing yourself from the dependency of external validation is a game-changer.
High standards keep you sharp. Low expectations keep you sane, and together they make you unstoppable.
So, aim up, but don’t wait around—you’ve got work to do.
Until next time,
Scott and Lennart